What is Self-esteem and why it matters?
Self-esteem means how we value and perceive ourselves.In short, its’ liking yourself and who you are 🙂
Don’t mistake it as being overconfident – just believing in yourself and knowing what you do well. Self-esteem can influence life in many ways, from academic or professional success to relationships and mental health.
Self-esteem is different for children in different age groups
For newborn babies and infants self-esteem is about liking yourself and who you are. For kid’s, it develops by knowing that you’re loved and you belong to a family that values you.
Toddlers find out about themselves by discovering what they look like – for instance, mirrors provide hours of fun to them. They also realize what they can do. And they’re discovering where they belong, often by seeking out their loved ones for comfort, protection and reassurance
At the primary school level, self-esteem tends to relate to many things – including how they look, how well they learn, how they do at dance or sport and how easily they make friends.
How to know if your child has self-esteem?
Children with low self-esteem will be:-
- Reluctant to try something new
- Self-critics and hard on themselves
- Lack of confidence
- Thinks of the times they failed rather than when they succeeded
- Always uncertain that they can do things well
- Quits soon after beginning a game or a task
- Cheats or lies when he believes he’s going to lose a game or do poorly
- He makes excuses for not doing something or not participating in an activity
- Overly concerned or sensitive about other people’s opinions
- Difficulty accepting praise or criticism
What can be done to boost your kid’s self-esteem?
A positive sense of self is the best and greatest gifts you can provide your Kid. Kids with high self-esteem will be happy, optimistic, competent and develop into energetic and productive people.
Consider trying these tips to boost self-esteem in your children and help them to build a positive self-image as they grow.
1. Let them know “No one is perfect”
Make it clear to them that no one expects them to be perfect.The way you react to your kid’s failures, mistakes and disappointments color the way they will react.Let them also know no one is perfect in this world, each individual has their own strengths and weakness.
2. Don’t do everything for them
Let them take healthy risks; yes allow them to do things out for themselves.Start by standing back while your child takes chances, make choices and take responsibility for them, to build confidence in the world, kids have to take risks.
For instance, you may be worried to allow your kid to take water out from a dispenser, but letting them do it themselves helps them learn new skills. The more they meet up new challenges, the more confident, competent and proficient they’ll feel.
3. Let kids make their own choices
Giving children age-appropriate choices will give them a privilege. When kids make their choices (within a reasonable set of options pre-selected by you) makes them feel empowered as well as take responsibility for their choices.
4. Assign them tasks
Give children responsibility for tasks such as cleaning the play area and their toys after play time, keeping utensils in the kitchen cabinets and folding laundry. This will increase their feelings of competency and strengthen their problem-solving skills because children need opportunities to demonstrate their competence and feel that their contribution is valuable
5. Over-praising does harm than good
Keep in mind that by over-praising them we are lowering the bar for them. If you are saying your child that they are already doing an incredible job, you’re saying they no longer need improvement. Compliment your child often, but be specific in your comments so your words don’t ring hollow.
For instance, if your kid is good in painting, don’t tell him that he is the best artist in the world. Instead, you can tell “You did a great job, you are specific to details, that you even draw bend on the tree’s branch”.
6. Please do not compare
Comparison hurts the most. Even as adults we hate comparison. Can you think of your partner or Boss comparing you with someone else? The same happens with the kids.Instead, you can appreciate their individuality and special talents.Remember each child is unique and gifted with special talents.
7. Know your childSpend one-on-one time with your child to know them more. Try to schedule some time with your child at least once a week, a bike ride, play time or walk through the streets can help. Bear in mind it’s a great opportunity to talk on what’s on their mind and to strengthen the bond.
8. Tell them that your love is unconditional
If all you talk about is performance, they will think you only love them for their report card or the prize secured in cultural or sports activity. So let your children know, you love them even when they fail or make a bad decision.
9. Encourage them to chase their interests
Another reliable way to boost confidence in children is to encourage them to take on tasks they show interest in, and then make sure they follow through to completion. It doesn’t matter what the task—it could be anything from swimming laps to beating levels in video games. The fact is for them to stay with what they begin, so they feel the hit of achievement towards the end.
10. Don’t use bad words or use sarcasm to make a pointNever belittle your child’s feelings. When you get irritated or gets angry take a deep breath and just leave the space, so you don’t say anything you’ll regret. “A word once spoken can’t be taken back and that word might be strong enough to break a heart”.
- Make sure your kids’ ambitions are at a level appropriate for their ability
- Try to maintain your self-esteem as for them you are their “HERO” and “ROLE MODEL“
confidence, kidstraining, parenting, self-esteem